Finding a Job Sucks: Buyer’s Remorse

The day of this post, I just got out of an interview with Kohl’s. I’m typing this up in Panera Bread, and the music is so loud!

Because of my desperation, I have resorted to applying to retail jobs. 

Kohl’s seemed reasonable enough. I applied. The process was uber easy. I applied for a sales position on Monday, and had my interview today, Thursday.

Sales just means cashier. I suppose if they actually posted “cashier” as the position, no one would apply. 

What I wore

I wore my standard interview outfit as of date: black slacks, orange lace camisole, charcoal gray cowl neck top, black heels, and my interview wig. The heels were overkill. I could have just worn my Walmart flats.

The Interview

I have to admit that I didn’t really prepare for this interview. I mean, it’s retail. I arrived ten minutes early so I could cool down from the drive and freshen up in the restroom, which smelled really floral and clean, btw.

I told the Latina lady at the customer service desk I was there for the 3:30 interview. There was no one there when I entered the restroom, but when I came out, she had a line of returns to deal with.

Another lady applicant showed up. She was white, heavy set, and looked like she was done with life. I’ll call her Suzy.

Associates walked back and forth past us without even a hint of interest or a glance. They seemed to be in their own little retail world. The lady at the customer service desk was sterotypically harried and stressed about something. The computers were acting up. What to do?

Suzy and I had been waiting for a while for someone to hurry up and greet us. My feet were starting to hurt in my three-inch heels. 

I looked at my phone, and the time said 3:40PM. I was getting irritated.

The customer service lady told us they were expecting a third applicant.

Oh, so it’s a cattle call.

Then this middle-aged worn down looking white man finally emerged from the back of the office and ushered Suzy and me into the inner sanctum of the Kohl’s staff area.

We sat at on the other side of desk and waited for the interview to commence, because…yeah. Let’s get this shown on the road. You already made us wait.

Suzy had mentioned earlier that she came down Glenwood Avenue and an accident had caused a back up.

She had just moved back home with her parents because a fallen tree damaged the apartment she was living in Wilmington. And the landlord insisted that the place was livable despite the tree knocking a hole in the roof producing an impromptu skylight.

I empathized with here waiting for the man to start the interview.

It was awkward.

The man was awkward. What was his title again? He barely spoke, barely asked questions, and when he did speak, it sounded like he had laryngitis.  I could barely hear him!

He asked Suzy and I to tell him about ourselves. Sigh. Why Kohl’s? Ugh, because it’s a muthaf*ckin’ paycheck. He asked us questions about a time we were rewarded for good performance, a time we dealt with a difficult client or vague direction from a client. Just very poorly thought out and executed questions on his part, partly because he didn’t (couldn’t?) project his voice, so he came off passive and inept. I don’t know if he was a manager or what, but he seemed totally unqualified to conduct the interview. And I can’t work for anyone stupid. 

He was literally struggling to come up with the proper questions. He was just weird and reminded me of Mr. Burns from the Simpsons. Shivers.

What a Waste of Time

I’m beginning to wonder if it’s even worth it to apply to these kinds of jobs. Kohl’s was looking for part-time, only paying $9/hour. I mean, I would be losing money on gas alone driving out there for that type of wage. Not even worth it. And to work under someone who is not even as smart as me, doesn’t have people skills, and can’t even talk–I’m just over it.

Walking out, I asked Suzy if she thought the interview was weird. She concurred. I wished her luck and was on my way.

Got the rejection email on Friday. 

I’m over it.

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